...And that would be writing a baby-care book!! Now how did this epiphany arrive...by stork, of course! No, actually by Facebook side comments. Here's how it happened...A third time new-Momma (hey, every bundle of joy is a new experience!!) posed the question, "How many times should you let your baby fill her pants before you do the unthinkable and wake her to change the diaper?" My response, after reading several others, was "train her to sleep half naked on a bucket and you've got both problems solved!" Momma replied that I sometimes make her speechless...an achievement in and of itself, I would say! Then, another commentator mentioned that I should write a baby-care book since Dave Barry (a humor columnist according to his site I just Googled) could. Since I originated the Balaam's Ass Theory of God's Way to Communicate...if He can speak through a donkey He can speak through any of us...I take that as a sign...sorta like "Maternity Ward," but given my gender and lack of biological children, we'll go with Grampa Ward, probably Section 8 of the local Funny Farm. (Some mixed metaphor that, Eh?!!)
Well, the FIRST baby-raising epiphany I had was when Lady Galadriel was changing her second-born's diaper back in '84 and I saw the process while I was doing some carpenter work for the family. Tending Jesus' sheepies is like tending babies...they eat, bleat, and excrete and expect all three functions to be dealt with by older sheepies who brought them into this mortal coil.
In regard to my sleep/cleanup response: I'm thinking about marketing Bob's Baby Bucket in soft, molded plastic to simulate the baby's shape, pink and blue swirly color so it works for both sexes, with inserts for smaller sized tykes so they don't slip through the opening. AND...for another small fee, we could offer Robert's Recyling Repository in which to hold the reprocessed baby formula for future use as fertilizer for the garden! Hey, when I used to work in Central Pennsylvania, some Amish folks used outhouse leftovers on their fields!! Smelled bad, but worked great.
Well, Grampa has to go tend to the mundane business of opening up Camp Cornelius buildings... kinda like Samuel opening up in the mornings...so all you sheepies keep expanding the Kingdom as you do and I'll have more to write later!!
Got formula?
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