#178: Intinction Feng Shui

Yessiree Bob, as the saying goes...I actually learned a new word and way of doing things over the weekend. Yesterday was The Cook's Momma's 86th Birthday so five Grey Haveners journeyed westward, but not across the Sea, just across the Susquehanna River, in order to visit, go to church with her, play some railroad canasta, laugh, and eat...not essentially in that order. Well, in church, we got to take communion "by intinction." For us high-church-challenged types, that means you dip the tasteless beige wafer (one change from the tasteless white wafer we used to get when I was Lutheran-raised) that I suppose is high in fiber or something in the wine and partake of it as you walk on by in a procession back to your pew.
Well, for some reason I thought of tincture of iodine when I saw the phrase in the bulletin (16 pages long it was!) and spiritualized the whole deal into thinking that we were getting antiseptic for our wounds in a Balm of Gilead sort of Tao. (Oh, yeah, my Chinese daughter pointed out to me that Tao means "way" in Mandarin.) Wikipedia just explained it to me thusly: "In Taoism, the basic, eternal principle of the universe that transcends reality and is the source of being, non-being, and change." So, when Jesus says He is the Way, the Truth, and the Life in John 14:6, I guess He's claiming to be "the basic, eternal principle of the universe that transcends reality and is the source of being, non-being, and change." Sounds like a fair translation to me, but, hey, that's why I'm kept in the basement and not let loose in classrooms!

Right now I'm actually listening to a cd entitled "Feng Shui" that Cook and I found in a Hallmark card store while birthday card shopping Saturday. Well, my Chinese granddaughter doubts the authenticity of the whole deal, based on the fact that there are cello, piano, keyboard, viola, and percussion instruments used to supplement the more traditional yang chin, guzheng, shakuhachi, and erhu. (foreign zither, ancient zither, recorder, and 2-string fiddle respectively, according to Wiki.) I believe the description of the music was "what they play in Chinese restaurants" ...seemingly to fool us Caucasus-Mountain-region-genealogical Barbarians while chowing down on pseudo-Szechuan stuff and handing over coin of the realm! I can say that it's most definitely a mellowing influence. We all know that "you are what you eat." I think "you are what you listen to" might be a good second rule, and right now I'm as "balanced and calm" (to quote the label) as can be next to being in a coma!

Well, there still aint nothin' that compares to "the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, [which] shall guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus" that Paul talks about in Philippians 4:7. I really like being able to see the True Tao in various other world life views from a Post-Reformation, Van Tillian, Zen Buddhist sort of way and pointing out a few things to the two of you reading this!! ;)
Got buzz words you can use?

#177: Feng Shui Day

Yeah, I'm taking some of that vacation time I'm allotted for being a diligent employee here at Camp Cornelius. This morning I even went down to The Garden, watered a nicely growing crop, and even weeded for about an hour...my achin' bacon!! ;( The picture shows some of my handiwork and some of God's. Mine is the little white-covered doodad known as my thumb with a post-operative splint for the guillotine work I did on it last week.
The beautiful orange flower is a zucchini in the making...obviously God's part in my gardening efforts. Actually, the watermelon vines are also up and starting to spread out on my first ever attempt at growing that particular delightful fruit. In fact, my mini Stone Henges (see Post #161), are going to have to be called Water Melon Henges since some melon plants are coming up instead of the Chinese maples I planted. Actually, I'm hoping I get water melon first and some tree saplings later in the season.

So what's this got to do with Feng Shui? Well, Feng Shui ("fung schway"), according to Wikipedia, "is an ancient Chinese practice believed to utilize the Laws of both heaven (astronomy) and earth (geography) to help one improve life by receiving positive Qi." Basically, rearrange your part of the planet in the way you want it to make your attitude good and improve your health as a result. The Bible's "Feng Shui" might be read in Ecclesiastes 9:10, "Whatever your hand finds to do, verily, do it with all your might; for there is no activity or planning or knowledge or wisdom in Sheol where you are going." Jump over to Colossians 3:23-24 for the rest of the formula, "Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance. It is the Lord Christ whom you serve."

Speaking of jumping...we watched "Jumpers" last night because it came with "Men In Black" as a two for one deal. The adage, you get what you pay for, is true. I believe I've seen this one twice already...first and last time! The only thing I can get out of this whole deal is that it's another anti-religion movie because Samuel Jackson and the other Paladins are bent on killing these young folks who can jump all over the world like some kind of super villains who steal money by popping into banks and out, steal cars by doing likewise, and leave people in bad places by grabbing them and dumping them. Jackson's character justifies the killing by saying, "Only God should have that power." Maybe some movie dude decided he was going to try to give us a clue as to how resurrection bodies are going to work? Guess we'll have to wait and see.

I hear Civil War Generals calling me again.
Got dry powder?

#176: Day of Small Things

One of the entries in my early morning readings was the first part of Jeremiah 45:5, "'But you, are you seeking great things for yourself? Do not seek them...'" This verse has been echoing in my head every so often for the last 28 years when I get the fat-headed idea of expanding my influence in the Kingdom. I'm also reminded of Ulysses S. Grant's idea that he would never seek a position higher than Providence would call him to because it would be presumption. Unlike many Civil War Generals, he did not seek to rise in the ranks of generals, but eventually became a Lieutenant General of all the Union Armies...the first since Washington, I believe.
Not sure where this is going. I guess whatever is in front of you at the moment, take care of that and let tomorrow and the "big" things take care of themselves or deal with them when you get there. Proverbs 6:6ff talks about "going to the ant" to observe and copy her ways, so maybe that's the next thing on your agenda?!
Gotta go see the Doc about 4 stitches and the healing of 1/20 of my bodily digits.
Got appointment?

#175: Custer, Korea, and Biblical Boomerangs

As usual, my copy of The One Year Book of Christian History has an interesting entry and marginal notes from my historical research for today's date in history. I'll deal with them in the order listed in the title rather than chronologically. (Hey, indulge me!)

On this day in 1876, a Sunday by the way, Lieutenant Colonel (he was down graded after the Civil War for lack of generalships in the regular army) George Armstrong Custer and the men of the Seventh Cavalry attacked a force 10-18 times their size without proper reconnaissance, breaking the Sabbath calm in order to get annihilated at the Battle of Little Big Horn. The interesting thing is that Custer had had an evangelical conversion experience in February, 1865 at a Presbyterian Church in Michigan while on furlough and should have had more respect for the Lord's Day. Of course, he had not had a chance to read my brilliant treatise on the Civil War pointing out the failure rate of Sunday attacks...oh, well. Maybe we'll discuss the whole deal at the Marriage Feast over pizza, beer, and cigars!! (Or should that be salt pork, hard tack crackers, and O Be Joyful, the home-brew of Civil War soldiers?!!)

Now, jump forward to mid-twentieth century, just a few months before I shuffled onto this mortal coil...On this same day in 1951, a Monday, China invaded Korea to initiate the Korean War. Given the outcome of the "police action," as it came to be called at times, the Chinese fall into the right category statistically in that the success rate of attacks on Mondays is inversely proportional to that on Sundays (67% vs. 33% respectively). It seems ironic that atheistic Communists would inadvertently follow the rules of engagement in Divine historical coincidence...maybe a piece of evidence indicating God really does raise up nations and bring them down for His particular purposes, as Daniel chapter 2 says!

Now, set the Way Back Machine (tip of the hat to the Rocky and Bullwinkle Show) for the distant past...back in 474 B.C., Xerxes wrote out his proclamation giving the Jews, who were going to be attacked due to Haman's political machinations, the right not only to defend themselves but to slaughter their attackers. The Book of Esther had three "boomerangs" in it...the classic number in Jewish numerology indicating Divinity...that show God's hand in history, I think. Haman had to parade Mordecai the Jew, whom he hated and planned to kill, through the streets on the king's horse to give him honor for saving Xerxes' life. Then he and his ten sons got hanged on the gallows he had built for Mordecai (800 more enemies of the Jews were killed in Susa), and finally the edict mentioned above put the boomerang of vengeance on a grand scale, with 75,000 enemies killed by Jews in the provinces. (I would highly recommend the movie, A Night with the King, as an excellent portrayal of Esther, with some Hollywood thrown in, of course.)

Soooo...here it is Wednesday, June 25, 2008. You have been raised up for just such a time as this in history. You have been appointed to walk in particular works set aside for you from before the foundation of the world. Wathcha gonna do about it?
Got Psalm 32: 8, 9 prayer request?

#174: Take a RISK!

I love RISK; especially when I win! Of course, the photography sucks! I guess those are the ups and downs of world conquest! Maybe I should stick to tearing down principalities, powers, world forces of darkness, and spiritual forces of wickedness in heavenly places. (Ephesians 6:10-20)
Well, I feel some Compassion Day non-compassionate aggression rising in my bones towards Heroes of Might and Magic IV.
Hmmmm...Is that particular version of the game like an IV-drip you can get in the hospital? Or would IV Drip be a suitable pseudonym if my gaming addiction kicks in?
Gotta roll...you know, like the dice in RISK.

#173: Shrapnel, 24 and Clay Jars

Well, it's official...I now have an even two dozen stitches placed in various parts of my personage over the course of my life. (Post #167 tells of the others.) The last four were added to my left thumb after the nail was sliced off (under Novocaine of some sort) and some aluminum shrapnel or other "foreign material" was removed, and the nail set back on top to protect the flesh as a "biologic dressing," something I never heard of before. I'm reminded of 2 Corinthians 4:7, "But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the surpassing greatness of the power may be of God and not from ourselves..." These earthen vessels were once described by one of my favorite seminary profs, Dr. G., as "cheap clay pots you bought at your local Corinthian K-mart," a description I thought good enough to be inserted in the margin of my Bible at the time for future references and also for remembrance of Dr. G.

Well, it looks like I've got another crack in my pot, so to speak...wise guy remarks about my being cracked will be accepted and ignored, tankewberrymuch! ;) Since I have to keep the dressing clean until Thursday's follow up visit, I guess I'm going to have to shun my natural qi as a Dirt Person, being made in the image of Adam the original Dirtball, and seek godliness so that the cleanliness can be "next to" it as a corollary ("cleanliness is next to godliness" is the adage). Fortunately, I picked the last of the Grey Havens radishes yesterday and I'm "in between" crops down in The Plateau Garden, so I don't HAVE to mess around in the dirt. Actually, I've got a bunch of compassion and vacation days to use up, so I'll chalk up some time and administrate as I feel "led."
Gotta go.

#172: Nineteenth Century Bob-ism

It just occurred to me that one of my favorite all-time quotes is a nineteenth century Bob-ism because it's short, sweet, to the point, and was a line from Robert Murray McCheyne. It says, "Live so as to be missed." In other words, treat people in such a way that your life will be memorable to them and make a difference in their lives, and when it's time to move on to other places for you or them, they will occasionally wish you were there!
Blaise Pascal put it another way, "The serene beauty of a holy life is the most powerful influence in the world next to the power of God."
Hmmmm....now that I think of it, I need to put these on my Facebook "favorite quotes."
Gotta go.

#171: Out For The Count

When a guy gets clobbered in the boxing ring, he is "out for the count" of ten for a knockout. The duration of the "Out For" phrase in these posts is likewise hammered, probably to make a comeback as "Out Of" since there are so many more possibilities for that particular combination of words. Of course, all this is subject to whatever whimsical mood I find myself in at the time of posting...self indulgence is a wonderful think of wind and water in the qi-seeking feng shui of life!
Well, today in 1941 was Adolf Hitler's big boo-boo on the geo-political chess board of world history. Not only did he ignore Napoleon's mess up of invading Russia, he broke the Sabbath lo those 67 years ago, too! Now, granted, that probably was not a high consideration of Hitler's world life view, even though he claimed to be a Christian in his work, Mein Kampf, but he and his troops suffered the consequences anyway. Since the board game, Risk, was not produced until 1957, Eddie Izzard's assumption in one of his comedy routines is correct when he suggests Old Adolf did NOT play it as a kid or he would have realized that invading Russia and the whole central Asia areas is not a good strategy in that particular game!
Now, perhaps if you were Genghis Khan and started out in that region, the game of most-of-the-world-conquest went OK for a few centuries, but like most vast empires over the course of time, his eventually collapsed after Kublai Khan died and the young'uns just couldn't keep up with the pace.
What, you ask, does this have to do with anything? On the one hand, nothing at all other than my historical ramblings. On the other hand...this would be the one with the cut left thumb still awaiting stitches on Tuesday...I can draw a Biblical lesson from which we all can profit. In Luke 14:28-35 we're told to "count the cost" in building a tower or fighting against a superior force or becoming a disciple. The King of Kings is infinitely strong, so if you are not part of His army, you might "want to send a delegation to sue for peace" as verse 32 suggests. If you're in His Corps, perhaps you want to check your "saltiness."
Got spiritual taste buds?

#170: Out For Some Clarity

I'm currently reading John Adams by David McCullough and came across yet another interesting quote that made me think about the claims of folks who say America was a "Christian nation" "back in the day." On pg. 130 it states, "That the hand of God was involved in the birth of the new nation he had no doubt. "It is the will of heaven that the two countries should be sundered forever.' If the people now were to have 'unbounded power,' and as the people were quite as capable of corruption as 'the great,' and thus high risks were involved, he would submit all his hopes and fears to an overruling providence, 'in which unfashionable as the faith may be, I firmly believe.'"
That phrase, in which unfashionable as the faith may be, clearly indicates that holding a Calvinistic belief in the God of the Bible as the One who runs world history and raises up or brings down nations was out of vogue for a large portion of the populace in 1776. It would appear that the same could be said as the nation continued to develop politically and religiously.

Patrick Henry, famed for his "Give me Liberty or give me Death" speech on March 23, 1775 wrote to his daughter, Betsy, on August 20, 1796, describing himself and the country, "The view which the rising greatness of our country presents to my eyes is greatly tarnished by the general prevalence of deism, which, with me, is but another name for vice and depravity....I hear it is said by the deists that I am one of their number; and indeed that some good people think I am no Christian. This thought gives me much more pain than the appellation of Tory, because I think religion of infinitely higher importance than politics, and I find much cause to reproach myself that I have lived so long and have given no decided and public proofs of my being a Christian. But, indeed, my dear child, this is a character which I prize far above all this world has or can boast."
(1)

It's my opinion that American Christians in the public domain and those who write history books and certain biographies are looking back to some idealistic "good old days" that the Book of Ecclesiastes says never existed, that can be statistically shown to not be the case, and are contributing to the "woe-is-us-let's-be-like-we-used-to-be" nostalgia that needs to be confronted with some hard nosed reality similar to that given to the nation of Israel under the prophecies of Isaiah, Jeremiah, and Ezekiel. In fact, I think it's the responsibility of preachers in America's pulpits to get their flocks ready for a real fleecing brought about by the God they say they worship as a result of their on-going refusal to follow the demands of the Great Commission.

But, Hey, the 10,000 non-denominational congregations of America should do as good old deist Tom Jefferson wrote in the Declaration and "with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence...mutually pledge to each other our lives, our fortunes, and our sacred honor." Who knows, maybe Jesus' prayer for unity in John 17 might come to be without a Persecution.

Got Odds or Evens?

Source: S.G. Arnold, The Life of Patrick Henry of Virginia. Miller, Orton & Mulligan, New York and Auburn, 1857, p. 249-250

#169: Out For Summer Fun

Well, my handy dandy pocket calendar told me (in a non-verbal way, of course) that today is the first day of summer...yippee! Last night, The Man Who Knows Everything (I know the rest) told me (in a verbal way, of course) that today is the longest day of the year, so I immediately asked if we were going to watch "The Longest Day" tonight in Grey Havens Theater....got no answer, I believe, so to quote Gimli in the extended version of "The Return of the King" after Aragorn cuts off the head of Sauron's emissary, "I guess that ends negotiations!"
In any event, you should take advantage of today's extra daylight hours to get out into the weather you've been given for the day...go for a walk with a friend, mess around in the garden, go ride my favorite ride at Hershey Park, stay in the air conditioning and read, write some emails, join Facebook like your friends have been bugging you to do...maybe even start your Christmas shopping early this year!
In any event, this is the day the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it...worry about tomorrow when it gets here; which, in fact, it never does because by the time YOU get there, it'll then be today! Think about it...today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday! My thoughts on worry can be summed up by the Divine Miss M...Bette Midler: "Why bother?!"
Got Matthew 6:33, 34?

#168: Out For Moderation

Well, for the second time in my blogging lifetime...a limited engagement begun 12/13/07...I'm "awaiting moderation" for some comments I made on somebody else's cyberspace turf. The last time this happened to me I got the royal boot...check out Posts #49 & 50 if you're interested in the details. This time I had some questions regarding the phrase that is the ace in the hole, so to speak, of cyber-dictators...
Should "awaiting moderation"...
1. Have to do with the Aristotelian Mean where one finds a happy medium between excess and deficiency? (Which makes me wonder if, given the Bible's negative statements about occult mediums if ANY of them can truly be seen as "happy.")
2. Have to do with some 12-step recovery program whereby the participant learns how to deal with his addictions without going cold turkey?
3. Take into account that the Moderator should exercise moderation rather than strict accountability and adherence to some set of preconceived standards that stifle the free speech of bloggers of contrary predilections?
4. Be considered a particular trial designed by the Lord to make you use the patience you already have as a result of having the fruit of the Spirit? (cf. Galatians 5:22-23)
That'll do for now. After all, I need to be moderate, Eh?

#167: Out For Stitches

With the advent of my last two posts, I figured I'd do an "Out For" series for however long the mood suits me. I found out this morning that,when I mess up...I mess up RIGHT!! I have to go get stitches in the old thumb because not only did I cut into the pulpy part known as the "nail bed" but even cut the end of the bone off. Long story short, the Doc's gotta mash down the flesh and sew it in place so the nail grows back over it, not through it....yippee!
I had to laugh when he called what I did a "freak accident." For me, it was more standard operating procedure, given the four other sets of 5-stitches I've gotten...one from a tricycle accident for head stitches at the tender age of four, some in my toes when I kicked a light in the ceiling outside my freshman dorm room, some in my knuckles from a bread drawer edge, and some in my knee from my own knife.
Rule of Thumb with Knives: ALWAYS cut away from yourself.
Rule of Thumb of Maintenance Men: Ignore the above Rule of Thumb!!
I'm sure all these things would not have happened if Adam and Eve had eaten Soup of the Day instead of the Fruit of Knowledge Platter "back in the day" as my young'uns say! ;(
Guess we're all victims, have issues, and are conflicted, Eh?
Got EEEUUUWWW?

#166: Out For Blood

Yeah, things have been entirely to placid here at Camp Cornelius, so, while taking apart an aluminum storm door that some moron illegally dumped in my trash bin, I got my thumb between the short handled sledge hammer I was using and the aluminum...which formed a nearly perfect guillotine for the upper part of my thumb!
This is one of those times you have to ask, "OK, Lord, just exactly HOW does this 'work together for my good' according to Romans 8:28?!!" As I mentioned in an earlier email...it'll give me another bad-weather's-coming barometer to complement the other ones I've got from clumsy and stupid acts of my past like slicing myself with sharp tools or punching a steel cabinet!
Oh, well...
Got Tylenol?

#165: Out for Justice

Nope, this is not a commentary on Steven Segal's movie (you know...bash, maim, and kill everybody who's not on your side) for those of you who are movie buffs. Hmmm...as a side thought, "in the buff" means naked. Does that mean "movie buffs" watch flicks without their clothes covering all the essentials? Ich, in many a case, I don't want THAT visual...But I digress!

I'm currently reading John Adams by David McCullough (why's the author's name on the top of every other page, anyway?!!) and came across an interesting quote (among many in an excellent biography), especially considering Adams' training as a lawyer and apparent Christian world life view. He wrote in his diary sometime around 1772 that he was not going to get into politics...yeah, right! Well, some visiting Englishman got him really steamed with remarks about "the English sense of justice...There was no more justice in Britain than in hell, he had told the Englishman." (p.70)
Now, what BETTER place to exemplify PERFECT justice than HELL?!!! By its very existence and nature, Hell IS God's justice, completely devoid of His mercy and grace. I guess logic goes out the window when you're in the heat of an argument...or complimenting a man by calling him "a Helluva guy" when the intention is that he's really a good old boy, as I've heard in the past.

I'm listening to "The Battle Hymn of the Republic" at the moment, so I'm thinking of His terrible swift sword, His Truth that marches on and on and never goes forth without accomplishing that for which He sent it (Isaiah 55:11), and His grace in providing The Way, The Truth, and The Life in Jesus (John 14:6); something which, ironically, Julia Ward Howe apparently rejected in spite of writing this hymn and her Presbyterian Christian parents' teaching as a child. Don't have much else to say, so I won't.

Got somebody who needs to read this?

#164: Civil War General a.k.a. Shotgun Bob

My writing style in these posts is what most editors would call a shotgun style...shooting a widespread pattern the further away from the target I get or covering everything and everyone with no focus on one particular thing. Up close, however, I could blow a hole in your preconceived notions if the Spirit's working on you. Needless to say, this whole introduction is prompted by the picture at the left taken at Hershey Park in one of those "dress up like the old days" shops. Union uniform seemed most appropriate or great grandpappy would have had a fit, so I picked a brigadier general's coat (two stars on the shoulders you can't see) and the ubiquitous unmarked kepi similar to the one that Joshua Lawrence Chamberlain wore. For the uninitiated, Chamberlain was the colonel at the Battle of Gettysburg who was instrumental in turning back the Confederate attack on Little Round Top. He eventually got a Congressional Medal of Honor for that action and also ended up with five serious wounds that bothered him for the rest of his long life (he got them in later battles). Most importantly in eternal perspective, he was a Christian, so I'll get to shoot the breeze with him and a bunch of other Civil War icons when I "cross the river and rest in the shade of the trees" as Stonewall Jackson of the CSA said before passing into glory.

One interesting (at least to me) bit of Civil War trivia: Christian Confederate General John Brown Gordon, also wounded five times (at the Battle of Antietam actually) surrendered the Army of Northern Virginia to Chamberlain when ordered to do so by General Lee. The mutual respect showed as a result of their graciousness...Chamberlain called his men to stand at attention when Confederates passed and Brown touched the tip of his sword to his boot as he got his horse to bow in acknowledgment...was yet another step that a different sort of Band of Brothers initiated to begin healing the torn apart nation.

It's interesting, too, that Gordon's story of the Civil War, Reminiscences of the Civil War, points out that the reason the South lost the Civil War was so that the nation could remain a whole in order to fight the Spanish American War in 1898 when Gordon wrote his book. Just the fact that he used the term "Civil War" put him at odds with a lot of Southerners who wanted to call it "The War Between the States." That is even more ironic because General Robert E. Lee called it a Civil War in a letter to his wife in 1861. Oh, well...

In Judges 3:1-2, it says, "Now these are the nations which the LORD left, to test Israel by them (that is, all who had not experienced any of the wars of Canaan; only in order that the generations of the sons of Israel might be taught war, those who had not experienced it formerly). " Then there's the line in Matthew 10:34 where the Prince of Peace says He did not come to bring peace but the sword. I wonder how many times the Lord will have to continue to use war to get His people's attention?

Got a guess?

#163: Saturday Outta the Sun

Tomorrow is Father's Day. If you've got the opportunity, give Old Dad a thrill by remembering him in some special way. I had to substitute Mom from 1958 when Dad took a chariot of fire into the Promised Land when his ticker quit. Hey, as I pointed out in #137, Mom and Dad were reunited on Father's Day, 2006, so I guess technically that makes me an orphan now. Or is there an age limit to that derivation?
Now that I think of it, howcome there aint a Son's Day?!! Or a Brother's Day or Uncle's Day or Celebrate Some Old Goat Day?!! I think Hallmark is missing out on some real cash flow increase by leaving out other holidays. Oh, well...their loss.

I also got a whole bunch of great photos from our trip to Hershey Park, many of which are classified so that our agents in the field are not compromised. However, the photographer of record has given permission to me to use them, so I will as occasion occurs and our agents get retired, kacked (tip of the hat to "Who Framed Roger Rabbit"), or otherwise don't care if they show up on the Internet. The one here shows how the Cub Scouts were right...Be Prepared! Without that bandanna, I probably would have had to "prepare to meet my God," to paraphrase Amos 4:12 with third degree burns on my not so hairy head. Hey, speaking of hair, I was telling a friend just yesterday that I think the Mark of Cain was male pattern baldness to distinguish him from all the hairy Mid-Eastern guys "back in the day." OK, so it sounds a bit screwy, but can you come up with a better idea that would make the dude stand out like a sore thumb to show his sin and yet to warn off prospective killers from doing just that?!! A loss of hair would also probably knock a hole in his love life, too; another aspect of the curse, I would suggest.

Well, I've been Facebooking a bit to see what friends are doing....even sent a freebie gift to one of my granddaughters to see if I have the techno-smarts to do something like that without the guidance of Elfson or his I.T. compatriots that would be strolling through Camp Cornelius on their way to the Grey Havens.

Since I'm going completely abstract-random: If you get the chance, watch the HBO series, "John Adams"!! Audioman and I started it Friday night and are already hooked. The acting is great; the guy who played the Carmine Falcone in "Batman Begins" (another favorite movie) and Gerald in "The Full Monty" (a laugher of a heart-warming story) plays Ben Franklin in good style. Actually, ALL the acting is first rate in my book and the way the production is done gives a WHOLE new look at 18th century America and the way things went down!

Well, I hear the call of battle at Gettysburg from Civil War Generals 2...
Got artillery and bayonets?

#162: Friday The 13th Musings

Ok...there are a bunch of folks out there who actually think today's unlucky. The Wikipedia article I just looked at says 17-21 MILLION in the U.S. alone are freaking out even as we speak, so to speak. Paraskavedekatriaphobia...the phrase meaning fear of Friday the 13th...costs $800 to $900 million loss of business in one day here in the good old USofA. I also learned that there is actually a place called Stress Management Center and Phobia Institute in Asheville, N.C. from which these figures emanate. Well, I managed my stress on Wednesday by indulging in a day of Scream Therapy in Pennsylvania's Stress Management Center, a.k.a. HERSHEY PARK!! The pics here are of two of my favorites: Sidewinder, that sends you through a bunch of coils frontwards and then repeats the process backwards and The Wildcat, a wooden coaster that will jar you every which way including loose!! Poor Elfson had a black-out moment on the Sidewinder and it was agreed by the other four Grey Havenites that if we ever return to Hershey, I'll be riding Sidewinder by myself!! (Something tells me this may have been my Last Hurrah there, however, based on my achin' bacon!)

Oh, here's a thought that I'm sure will thrill most of y'all: UNIX time (whatever the heck that is) will reach 1,234,567,890 decimal seconds on Friday, February 13, 2009 at 23:31:30 GMT (that's 11:31:30pm in Greenwich, England)....Good grief, I just clicked on the UNIX time and GMT blue gizmos that take you to another Wiki article and am further convinced that the guys who devised these time schemes and calculated all this crap should be Channeled Masters for Self Indulgent B.S., with emphasis on the last part. Doesn't anybody notice that all this Greenwich Mean Time stuff is Anglo Saxon ethnocentrism?!! Why, the one article even mentioned that the Irish changed from Dublin Mean Time to Greenwich Mean Time in 1916...THE CELTS FINALLY CAVED IN!!!

Well, I say we should all mark down that day in our Daytimers, Pocket Calendars, Ipods, and Whatevers! in order to show up for a party or the end of the world! Oh, and while I think of it, if there's a Mean time, is there a Kind time somewhere on the other side of the planet? Or would that be something on Sesame Street? And why "Sesame Street"? Why not Poppyseed Place? Why not the Rye Bread Republic? How about Bagel Alley? Maybe I should start an advertising agency on this "asspicious day" as one drunk in a bar scene called Unification Day in the "Firefly" series. I'm rambling, I know, but, as Captain Malcolm Reynolds said to River Tam in "Serenity," "It's what I do, Darlin'...it's what I do!!"

Got buildings without a thirteenth floor to open?

#161: Stonehenge Figured Out

Earlier this morning, before I started on the Chinese Tree Feng Shui, I was watering the Garden of Vegetable Delights and was reminded to take a picture of my four miniature stone henges because I finally came up with the reason the Druids built those big rock monuments in the first place.
See, yesterday when I was pruning Bobbosan Chinese Lacy Leaf Maple, the first tree I planted here at Camp Cornelius in 1986, and Lady Jane Chinese Red Maple, I discovered seed pods hanging on these two trees...a phenomenon I have not noticed in 22 years.
What I did was plucked some of the seeds, went to The Garden, stuck them in the dirt, put rocks around them in a Feng Shui Stone Henge sort of way so I would remember where exactly I planted them, and then hosed the place down.
Soooo...I figure, "back in the day" of Stonehenging, the guys who built them were the pre-Flood giants talked about in the Bible, similar to or larger than 9'9" Goliath that David "rocked to sleep" so to speak. Just imagine a whole planet filled with these big guys, moving rocks around just to stay in shape, pruning and planting trees, and all that other good pre-Flood stuff they did. Now...some forgetful druid decides he's gonna plant a tree, but knows he'll forget his Forget Me Nots, so he decides to set up some rocks to mark the nursery. After all these years, the tree's gone but the rocks remain...simple solution for an incredibly obtuse problem. As Hannibal Smith of the A-team was wont to say, "I love it when a plan comes together!"
Got Da-Da-Da music?!!

#160: Tree Feng Shui

Good old Chinese Feng Shui is supposed to use the laws of heaven and earth to help an individual achieve improved life by receiving positive qi, or energy. Just like the Marine Corps stole "Semper Fidelis" ("Always Faithful") from God , the ancient Yinyangs (my phrase for a yin/yang practitioner) took the principle of "God created the heavens and the earth" to its illogical conclusion as part of being made in His image as well as "thinking themselves wise" enough to do it on their own without his help.
I, on the other hand, have the divinely designed job of pruning the trees here at Camp Cornelius with the Holy Spirit indwelling me and giving me directions if I have the smarts to think or say, "Well, Lord, how do we prune this one?!" As you can see from the picture, we now have Biblical Feng Shui (at least in my opinion) at this part of the grounds because the trees feel better with all that excess weight removed, I feel better because I've got yet another job done and I like the way it looks, and unless I hear otherwise, the general consensus is that the trees look good...which makes everybody else's qi fine and dandy.
The heat wave we're currently enjoying has driven me inside for the mo' so I'm administrating and writing as I go on a sliding scale of time on and off. You might say it's my Feng Shui Twilight Zone Vacation/Work Qi 4 Me!!
Got Post-Reformational, Van Tillian Zen Buddhist Garden of Eden?

#159: Nursery Duty

Nope, not with rugrats, but with vegetables. We've got two kinds of radishes, cucumbers, three types of onions, zucchini, carrots, and even some watermelon on the leaf. Genesis 1:9 says, "Then God said, 'Let the waters below the heavens be gathered into one place, and let the dry land appear'; and it was so." Howcome He didn't just say, "Let there be dirt!" is what I want to know. Seems like the natural follow up to "Let there be light!" (And He didn't mean a Bud Light.)
Well, then there was the glorious Flower Henge to water, weed, and nurture with kindly words, like "GROW OR I'LL MOW!!" Ya just gotta know how to schmooz those little cuties! ;)
I guess you could say the Biblical version would be, "Then God said, 'Let the earth sprout vegetation, plants yielding seed, and fruit trees bearing fruit after their kind, with seed in them, on the earth'; and it was so."
Well, I've got the "Maverick" version of "Amazing Grace" running at the moment, I got back on this here thing here because my !@#$%^Civil War Generals crashed on me just as I was annihilating the Yankees at Fredericksburg...ya know, I wonder if Great Grandpappy Antes had something to do with that...given he served with the 119th Pennsylvania Volunteers south of Fredericksburg during The War?!! Hmph! "Going Home" from "Gods and Generals" just came on, so I'm takin' that as a Divine Sign to move along down to the Grey Havens and get to the next piece of business the Lord laid out beforehand that I should walk in it. (Ephesians 2:10)
Got marching orders?

#158: It's 6.7.8

Yep, you won't have this numerical alignment for a date until next century! Think you'll be around then? Only if medical science advances enough to let you live another 100 years, but my question would be, "Why would you WANT to if you know there's a seat at the Marriage Feast table for you?!!" Of course, if you're reading this and don't know if there's a seat set aside for you or even what the heck I'm writing about, I can understand why you want to go on living for another 100 years. If you happen to be in that boat without a paddle OR a rudder...give this a whirl: "Hey, God...if you're there and this Jesus Stuff is true, show me!"...and expect to get an answer.

Let's see, it's supposed to be 93 degrees today with a heat index over 100 here in sunny southeast Pennsyltucky! Down here in the bowels of Stonewalled Charismatic it's a cool 73 behind the thickness of the stones and 8' below ground level....AND Judy Collins is singing "Amazing Grace" in my favorite version. (Lookit up on You Tube if you're a young'un and ain't heard it yet or do it for the memories if you're an old head!) Hmmm...wonder if Judy has ever come to know the Lord?...Bring her on board, Lord, a.s.a.p.!! AND DO THE SAME FOR MY WHOLE AINTS LIST!!!

On a slightly different note: I heard last night on TV when I was at the local "watering hole" that Hillarity is now backing Barracks against The John in the race for President of the US of A. I'm bettin' there will be some wicked twists and turns to this maneuver! If anyone thinks the Clintons are a bankrupt power brokerage firm, they'd better grab a copy of Machiavelli's The Prince and have a quick read over the weekend....I'm gonna check MSN to see what's cookin'...

OK, here's THE most unhealthy stuff and places to eat:
The Saltiest Dish in America: Romano's Macaroni Grill Chicken Portobello
Saltiest Appetizer: Papa John's Cheese sticks with Buffalo Sauce
Saltiest Pizza: Pizza Hut Meat Lover's Stuffed Crust Pizza
Why do I suddenly want to drink more distilled water?!! If this were Old Testament times, could this be called The Mrs. Lot Salt Report?!!
Oh, I was informed earlier this morning (after bacon, eggs, toast, juice & coffee) that it's "get your own lunch" and "dogs for dinner" at the Grey Havens, so I'm as happy as a hog in slop...that's my idea of the perfect day!! ;)

Since I'm on the topic of eating: some brainiac wants us to eat more BUGS to improve our health and the environment!! Well, last night's viewing of "King Kong" (the 2005 version) showed that, if you don't eat them, they'll EAT YOU!! I say we should have a revival of the old fashioned nuclear radiation bug movies like "THEM" so we can further dement yet another generation! How about that classic scene in "The Fly" (1958) where the guy's head is on the fly's body, caught in a spider web calling, "Help me! Help me!" in a high pitched voice?!! And, of course, there are Godzilla and Mothra to consider as classics that need to be rewatched!!
Oh, the article I just read talked about eating locusts, honey ants, crickets, and others. AND WHAT WAS IT THAT JOHN THE BAPTIST ATE? LOCUSTS AND WILD HONEY!! (Gee, the brainiacs are catching up to the Bible a coupla thousand years after the fact YET AGAIN!! By the way, read Leviticus 11 if you want to find out God's view of permissible foods from a health standpoint!! Forget about that incident with Peter and the sheet with unclean animals...the point of the text was GENTILE EVANGELISM, not dietary restrictions being lifted!!

Well, I'm off to Facebook to see what my Friends are doin' today...
I'm reminded of Proverbs 25:25, "Like cold water to a weary soul, so is good news from a distant land." Maybe I can give a cup of cold water to some sheep in the time upcoming?
Got Matthew 25:35-46?

#157: D-Day Deliberation

Let's hear it for Thesaurus.com for giving me a word that means "thought" but starts with a "d" to alliterate the title! Yes, today in 1944 the largest invasion force in world history attacked Hitler's Fortress Europa so that the forces of "good" could turn back the onslaught of the forces of "evil." Given my propensity to see ALL nations as pagan, standing firmly against God's Truth, you can understand the "bunny ears" around the descriptive words.

Anyway, whilst contemplating life in my inner room over my usual morning devotionals, some interesting connections were woven into my brain synapses. The One Year Book of Christian History points out that on this day in1819, Adoniram Judson received a letter from a Burmese man named Moung Nau who wanted to become a Christian (the first convert in six years of laboring for Judson) and join the "band of brothers, in the happiness of heaven..." Naturally, that phrase stimulated my adrenal cortex to think of the HBO series "Band of Brothers" that follows Easy Company of the 506th Regiment, 101st Airborne, including their jump behind lines on D-Day.

The next thread in the thought tapestry was from Charles Spurgeon's thoughts in Beside Still Waters: Words of Comfort for the Soul. "Beloved, we will never be put to shame, even amid the grandeur of eternity. We will pass into the next state. After a while, the trumpet will sound [a necessity in order to ensure ALL Christians show up on time for the first time in history] and these bodies will rise, and then we will stand with the countless throng on that great day for which all other days were made (1 Thess. 4:14-18)." Guess you could call that Divine D-Day!
The last idea was expressed by Andrew Murray in Thoughts for the Quiet Hour, " Beware, in your prayer, above everything, of limiting God, not only by unbelief, but by fancying that you know what He can do. Expect unexpected things, above all that we ask or think. Each time you intercede, be quiet first and worship God in His glory. Think of what He can do, of how He delights to hear Christ, of your place in Christ; and expect great things."

Now, Stephen E. Ambrose writes in D-Day: June 6, 1944: The Climactic Battle of World War II, "At the beginning of 1944, Nazi Germany's fundamental problem was that she had conquered more territory than she could defend, but Hitler had a conqueror's mentality and he insisted on defending every inch of occupied soil."

YOU, unlike Hitler, are "more than conquerors" according to Paul in Romans 8:37 and conquering Enemy territory while you're surrounded in the power of Christ is your calling, according to John 15:16!
Got Heavenly Artillery aimed?!!

#156: Good Dirt

Everybody who knows me has heard me say that the day before the Fall Adam was a gardener and the day after it he was a maintenance man. I've been striving to gain access to my original design in a post-Reformational, Van Tillian, Zen Buddhist feng shui sort of way by planting not only one, but two gardens this year! (As you can see, the metaphysical fertilizer flows regularly in this region of cyberspace, but what would you expect, given the blog name?!!)
Well, the good dirt of the Grey Havens Garden, the Lord's rain sent on our area quite propitiously this year so far, Miracle Gro, prayer, and good seed have produced the first fruits (veggies, actually) of the growing season. For those of you who appreciate spicy radishes, these babies were (notice the past tense) EXCELLENT, Duuudes and Duuuudesses! Granted, they're a bit premature for "proper" picking, so I simply justified my haste by calling it part of the "thinning" required by the seed packets to The Cook. (He wasn't going to eat them anyway.)
Well, I'm reminded of Matthew 13:23, "And the one on whom seed was sown on the good soil, this is the man who hears the word and understands it; who indeed bears fruit, and brings forth, some a hundredfold, some sixty, and some thirty." When you're prayin' for yourself or others, ask for the hundredfold fruit...I do for you!
Got gracious God?!!

#155: Tough Life

2 Corinthians 1:3-4 says, "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort; who comforts us in all our affliction so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God."
Now, this might give you the warm fuzzies when you think about helping other people, but you have to go through a bunch of crap first to get ready for them, so get ready!
Guess that's it for now.