#84: Completely Abstract Random

Well, here we are on March 10, the 110th anniversary of my maternal grandfather's birth and I've had all kinds of thoughts pass through my head this morning.
Back in the 60s we had these things called Whacky Plaques. This was one of my favorites and seems appropriate for my life most days. However, it ALSO inspired me to consider developing a chain of bathroom interior decorator shops called Plan A Head! Catchy, hunh?!! (For those of you unschooled in such things, "head" is what the bathroom is called on ships.)
Then there's the question: why is it called ozone? Why not a-zone, or b-zone, or any-other-letter-zone? All football fans know about The Red Zone (back in the 50s that would have been Hollywood being investigated by the House Un-American Activities Committee)(Google it, youngsters, if you're confused!!), but when an athlete is in The Zone, just where exactly IS he/she?! Is it similar to an out of body experience or an out of mind experience?
Shouldn't there be something like a twelve-letter word for "crossword puzzler?" "Wordsmith" works, but is only nine. (All entries addressed to sextonbobsexton@gmail will be properly considered.)
Hmmm...I know one, but it will have to be issued posthumously or I'll "get killed" for posting it.
I just realized that, if posthumously means after you're dead, then you're reading this humously! Are you feeling humous today? If you're not, maybe you should call a doctor.
Is it any wonder raisin bread tastes soooooooooo good?!! Lookit the last three letters of rai-sin!!
Wyizzit that when you microwave coffee it'll raise blisters on your lips for the first two sips and then suddenly it's tepid instantaneously? Sooo...you pop it back in the micro and POW! you get scorched lips AGAIN!! Can't there be a happy medium? Hmmm...probably not because NOBODY dealing in the occult world of telling the future and communicating with the dead can be happy here or in eternity!!
And wyizzit that kitchens have to have ceiling fans over the table so they cause the food to get cold FASTER?!!
Who was it that ate shrimp for the first time?
Just EXACTLY how happy IS a clam, based on the age old saying?
Gotta go before my brain melts...although, THAT might be the name of a really tasty sandwich with melted cheese on a croissant in a store that lets you sip microwaved coffee while reading a book!!
Got entrepreneurial cash?