#92: Up The Creek Presbyterians et al

I play this great game called Heroes of Might & Magic IV that has an editor function that let's you build your own scenarios. Well, I constructed an on-going series about Balderdash Bob the Barbarian (one of the peoples you can be). Well, they've got these churches where your armies can hide from the Bad Guys (almost like real life) and have dead heroes get resurrected.
Well, I stuck a few churches around the landscape with sign boards outside I thought would never show up in real life, but should:

Up The Creek Presbyterian Church. Dead Guys welcome. Conversions possible, but only by Committee or direct act by the Living One of Truth!! Sprinklings on occasion, but only by appointment.

Brimstone Babdist Church. Dragons across the creek supply us with plenty of Fire and Brimstone for our sermons. Pot luck suppers get interesting, too. Stop by Saturday for mystery meat stew. It's guarenteed to resurrect your dead heroes.

Independent Flaming Out of Control Church. We cater to Barbarians AND regular old Citizens. Traditional Service in the late morning. Totally Whacked Service about sunrise or whenever the Barbarians arrive. All donations to replace the busted up furniture gladly accepted.

First Stronghold Barbarian Church. We break up the furniture EVERY week with our wild services, but not to worry, we have lots of carpenters on the Deacon Board!!

Washem Sloshem Babdist Church. We were the first ones here. We have two daughter churches, even if they think they're on their own!

Rockpile Babdist. Those folks down the road just don't seem to understand worship the way we want them to, so we moved out and built the walls you see around us. We tore down the blacksmith's shop, since he was the Deacon who donated the land, and built our sanctuary on the foundation.

Balderdash Barbarian Church. Use to be First Stronghold Barbarian, but BB financed the cobblestone road and a whole new set of pews, so we thought we'd flatter him a bit by changing the name. OK, so sue us...we're Barbarians!! Services same time, still wild as ever; especially since The Twins run rampant during services when Medusianna [Balderdash Bob's wife] just doesn't feel like controlling them!

Middle of Nowhere Methodist. We're still here, still climbing the pole to see if any pilgrims are coming our way.

Brimstone Babdist. We still preach it like it is, but Textus Receptus cleaned up the town of dragons, so mystery meat pot lucks aren't nearly as mysterious any more. Hog farming seems to be popular these days, sometimes leading to a bunch of them running into Dogwood Creek for some reason!
Got scenario suggestions?